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omonatheydidThe Beatles may have sung "all you need is love," but in South Korea a couple wanting to get married also needs cash, a lot of it - nearly $200,000, or more than four times the average annual income.
The sky-high costs stem from a combination of cultural traditions that mandate expensive pre-wedding gifts between families, such as mink coats and diamond rings, along with a decades-old custom that the groom must fork over money to provide a home.
The average cost for a wedding in 2011 rose about 270 per cent from 1999, while the inflation during the same period rose 45.5 per cent. Total costs far outstripped the average annual household income at around 48.3 million Korean won ($42,400), according to government data.
Thus, young couples seeking to unite in wedded bliss are forced to borrow from parents or take out loans. With candid discussions of money a cultural taboo in Korea, many are reluctant to speak about the high cost of exchanging vows.
"Korean society is very tightly knit, and people here are very concerned about how others view them," said Harris H. Kim, a sociology assistant professor at Ewha Womans University.
"The wedding works as a status symbol, like a marker of where you stand in the society," he added.
One 27-year-old woman working in the financial industry, who like many others asked to remain anonymous, said her parents paid nearly 90 per cent of her 140 million won ($122,900) wedding costs.
"We had to use our parents' money, which probably came from the sacrifice of their own retirement savings," she said.
A 30-year old kindergarten teacher who would only give her surname, Kim, said her husband, whose income is 40 million won, took out a loan for 45 million won in addition to financial aid from their parents for a wedding with 600 guests. The couple didn't know half the people, who were their parents' friends.
Gift-giving also takes a hefty chunk of the cash. Traditionally, the bride and groom's families have exchanged gifts - good silk for new clothes and simple jewelry - as a way of thanking the other family. But these days the silk has turned into fur or luxury handbags, while the jewelry has morphed into a full set of gems.
But the biggest part of the wedding budget comes from soaring housing prices, according to data from couple.net, a matchmaking company. The money spent by happy couples for housing last year was 2.5 times higher than in 2000, making up nearly 70 per cent of the total cost of a wedding.
"I've had many customers in the last five years who directly asked for a spouse who can at least afford to rent a house," said Sungmi Lee, a manager at couple.net.
Although most couples choose to spend the money, many are less than happy about it.
"None of that expensive jewelry is actually useful or beautiful, and you know you'll just regret using the money for that after you're actually married and need money for your married life," said Kisun Lee, a 29-year-old consultant. ($1 = 1138.6000 Korean won)
Source: vancouversun
The sky-high costs stem from a combination of cultural traditions that mandate expensive pre-wedding gifts between families, such as mink coats and diamond rings, along with a decades-old custom that the groom must fork over money to provide a home.
The average cost for a wedding in 2011 rose about 270 per cent from 1999, while the inflation during the same period rose 45.5 per cent. Total costs far outstripped the average annual household income at around 48.3 million Korean won ($42,400), according to government data.
Thus, young couples seeking to unite in wedded bliss are forced to borrow from parents or take out loans. With candid discussions of money a cultural taboo in Korea, many are reluctant to speak about the high cost of exchanging vows.
"Korean society is very tightly knit, and people here are very concerned about how others view them," said Harris H. Kim, a sociology assistant professor at Ewha Womans University.
"The wedding works as a status symbol, like a marker of where you stand in the society," he added.
One 27-year-old woman working in the financial industry, who like many others asked to remain anonymous, said her parents paid nearly 90 per cent of her 140 million won ($122,900) wedding costs.
"We had to use our parents' money, which probably came from the sacrifice of their own retirement savings," she said.
A 30-year old kindergarten teacher who would only give her surname, Kim, said her husband, whose income is 40 million won, took out a loan for 45 million won in addition to financial aid from their parents for a wedding with 600 guests. The couple didn't know half the people, who were their parents' friends.
Gift-giving also takes a hefty chunk of the cash. Traditionally, the bride and groom's families have exchanged gifts - good silk for new clothes and simple jewelry - as a way of thanking the other family. But these days the silk has turned into fur or luxury handbags, while the jewelry has morphed into a full set of gems.
But the biggest part of the wedding budget comes from soaring housing prices, according to data from couple.net, a matchmaking company. The money spent by happy couples for housing last year was 2.5 times higher than in 2000, making up nearly 70 per cent of the total cost of a wedding.
"I've had many customers in the last five years who directly asked for a spouse who can at least afford to rent a house," said Sungmi Lee, a manager at couple.net.
Although most couples choose to spend the money, many are less than happy about it.
"None of that expensive jewelry is actually useful or beautiful, and you know you'll just regret using the money for that after you're actually married and need money for your married life," said Kisun Lee, a 29-year-old consultant. ($1 = 1138.6000 Korean won)
Source: vancouversun
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no subject
Date: 2012-04-27 04:47 pm (UTC)No ceremony for me! Fuck that.
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Date: 2012-04-27 04:52 pm (UTC)Also housing prices need to come down already, my generation is screwed tbh.
no subject
Date: 2012-04-27 05:10 pm (UTC)the amount of money you would have to pay for a small box house ;___;
(no subject)
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Date: 2012-04-27 05:04 pm (UTC)at 13, i thought it was ridiculous. still do now. you're better off saving that money to live comfortably AFTER the wedding.
but yes, being able to afford a house (at least rent) is a very important factor when deciding to get married.
no subject
Date: 2012-04-27 05:08 pm (UTC)Am I crazy that I don't really care about my wedding to much?
(maybe I will when I ACTUALLY get married, but now I don't)
my moms wedding dress was 200 dollars. not 2000, 200.
no subject
Date: 2012-04-28 03:29 am (UTC)And yeah my mom's wedding dress cost $300 in the 1980s.
no subject
Date: 2012-04-27 05:16 pm (UTC)To be fair this isn't a Korean thing, it's the same in many other cultures. Maybe it's time to break with tradition.
I'll never understand why people spend the equivalent of several years wages on what is basically just an elaborate party.
no subject
Date: 2012-04-27 05:31 pm (UTC)(no subject)
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Date: 2012-04-27 05:17 pm (UTC)I remember having an older male friend tell me that he needed to save a lot of money. When I asked why, he told me that getting married was very expensive and he (and, in turn, his family - his parents own a fried chicken place) needed to provide the house on top of everything else. There's stress all around, but what got me was that he didn't have a girlfriend at the time. With how marriages work in Korea, I can see why he was thinking about it then. :/
no subject
Date: 2012-04-27 05:23 pm (UTC)(no subject)
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Date: 2012-04-27 05:27 pm (UTC)Poor guys.
Thanks so much for the intimate ceremony of my dreams with my mom's dress.
no subject
Date: 2012-04-27 05:29 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-04-27 05:31 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-04-27 05:58 pm (UTC)(no subject)
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Date: 2012-04-27 05:33 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-04-27 06:20 pm (UTC)(no subject)
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Date: 2012-04-27 06:06 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-04-27 06:06 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-04-27 06:10 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-04-27 06:21 pm (UTC)Okay minus the tacky joke, now I can see why people don't want to marry early. The amount of pressure on the individual must be immense.
no subject
Date: 2012-04-27 07:29 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-04-27 06:26 pm (UTC)Maybe it's because I come from a family where everyone who has gotten married has gotten divorced at least once (well minus my grandparents and one cousin). And that is both sides of the family!
I know people who put a ton of money in to their wedding to impress people and yet their relationship is falling apart months in to their marriage. I think a lot of people put too much emphasis on the event and not the actual relationship.
If I ever get married it's going to be simple and personal. While a wedding is important, it's not that important to destroy your finances over.
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Date: 2012-04-27 06:44 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-04-27 07:33 pm (UTC)My cousin got into an epic fight with her mom, because her mom wanted aa very lavish wedding and went crazy with the credit card and loans. Her dad was also due for retirement next year. Cousin threatened to walk out of the wedding when it got too much.
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Date: 2012-04-27 07:34 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-04-28 02:31 am (UTC)(no subject)
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Date: 2012-04-27 08:47 pm (UTC)It's why I want to elope and use money saved up on a decent honey out of the U.S.
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Date: 2012-04-27 09:26 pm (UTC)(no subject)
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Date: 2012-04-27 10:23 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-04-28 01:04 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-04-28 02:15 am (UTC)The crazier people have two or three weddings (one western style, one Korean style, maybe one in the congregation or at temple though kind of uncommon) and pay stupid crazy fees to rent spaces, buy gowns, wedding planners, etc etc.
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Date: 2012-04-28 02:20 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-04-28 02:30 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-04-28 03:00 am (UTC)And my cousin had about 1000 people at her wedding. I really want to know how someone could possibly know that many people.